20 Characteristics Christian Women Should Pray to Obtain
Have you ever gone to church, and while the pastor spoke about his sermon, you felt convicted as if he were speaking directly to you? Such conviction makes you wonder about some areas in your life that you should reevaluate and change. Or maybe you are a woman who walked your whole life thinking that you have a wonderful character until someone corrects you with the Word of God. Now, you question what other characteristics you still need to know fully with the understanding you should have.
I want to inform you that you are not alone. Viewing my life based on morals and principles of why I obtained certain things to protect my purity in almost every area was acceptable to me until I was hit with a reality check from a friend.
“Do you live your life with a character based on morals and principles, or do you live your life with an awe for God because you love and respectfully fear Him?”
That question was a real one that changed the trajectory of my life, causing me to reevaluate myself and my walk with God.
As you seek Godly characteristics, please ask yourself the same question that was asked to me. “Are you changing to attain a clean moral record, or are you seeking change because you are in love with God and want to become a transformed child of God that He has knitted you to be in His image?” If you are still trying to decide but are still seeking, please continue to read the 20 characteristics you should pray to obtain in your everyday life.
1. Integrity
○ Definition: “Firm adherence act/actions) to a code of especially moral or artistic values.”
What does integrity look like?
They have respect for other people. They are being honest and a well-trusted person who is supportive and takes responsibility for their actions. And a woman of your word.
“Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out.”
Proverbs 10:9
2. Purity
○ Definition: “The quality state of being pure.”
Purity goes beyond your sexual and physical being; purity in your heart and mind is just as crucial in maintaining the body of Christ. Purity is not just for single women but for all women and men. Maintaining a pure heart with a mind and body allows you to be closer to God and His Spirit. It will enable you to live by the Spirit of truth and follow Jesus’ example through actions. Being like-minded in Christ Jesus will help you maintain the characteristics listed and allow you to feel clean and accessible.
“Command and teach these things. Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity. Until I come devote yourself to the public reading of scripture, to preaching and to teaching. Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through prophecy when the body of elders laid their hands on you.”
1 Timothy 4:11-14
3. Faithfulness
○ Definition: “Steadfast in affection or allegiance.” (Loyal)
“If we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot disown himself.”
2 Timothy 2:13
” God is faithful, who has called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”
1 Corinthians 1:9
“Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer. I tell you, the devil will put some of you in prison to test you, and you will suffer persecution for ten days. Be faithful, even to the point of death, and I will give you life as your victor’s crown.”
Revelation 2:10
“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”
1 Corinthians 10:13
4. Forgiving
○ Definition: “To cease to feel resentment against (an offender).”
Forgiving. What can I say? In any area in your life where you might feel triggered by someone or something, let it be known that the effects it has on your mood and day mean that there is an underlying place in your heart where you need closure, which follows behind forgiveness. People tend to perceive forgiveness as a one-time thing, which is incorrect. Forgiving is a daily action that you must live by. Just as you cry to your Father about a situation you’re doing, and He forgives you, it is the same as you crying about another person’s doing. It would help if you learned how to forgive in every season of your life. For your peace! Can you imagine holding onto someone else’s wrongdoings while they are living life with the forgiveness of God? I am not saying you will completely forget everything, let alone will not be hurt by that person right after you choose to, but daily forgiveness will allow you to move on.
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Ephesians 4:30-32
5. Humility
○ Definition: “Freedom from pride or arrogance: the quality or state of humility.”
Humility involves self-awareness of your strengths and weaknesses. You may notice that you need help in some areas that you cannot fulfill yourself, so admitting that you may need help from someone else is just one example of humility. Walking alongside Jesus, you will see that you need His guidance in everything you do. You will become dependent on Him and realize that God’s path is better suited for you than your own. Other ways that humility takes form are by receiving feedback from others, forgiving and asking for forgiveness, taking accountability for your mistakes, and practicing gratitude.
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you have a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity”
Colossians 3:12-14
6. Discernment
○ Definition: “The quality of being able to grasp and comprehend what is obscure: skill in discerning.”
Walking in the Word of God, you can make wise decisions based on your observations, prayers, Godly counsel, and awareness (discernment) of what the Holy Spirit has revealed to you.
“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even dividing soul and Spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”
Hebrews 4:12
7. Wisdom
○ Definition: A “Ability to discern inner qualities and relationships (insight).”
○ B “Good sense of judgment.”
“The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom.
Though it cost all you have, get understanding.”
Proverbs 4:7
” Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.”
Ephesians 5:15-16
“The one who gets wisdom loves life;
the one who cherishes understanding will soon prosper.”
Proverbs 19:8
8. Hospitality
○ Definition: “hospitable treatment, reception, or disposition.”
When you show great hospitality, you bring an aura to your guests, allowing them to feel welcome from your friendly presence. A few ways to show hospitality are inviting people to your house. You could have brunch or dinner ready for everyone to eat, and as you speak to them, you can genuinely listen to them and show some interest in them.
“Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.”
Hebrews 13:2
9. Teachable
○ Definition: “Capable of being taught and willing to learn.”
Becoming someone who can allow other people to teach them Is a highly recognizable trait that stands out. Not many people like to be corrected or taught when someone has lived a particular way of life for some time, but it becomes rewarding when you allow yourself to be taught. The Holy Spirit is our teacher, and He will teach you things in any way or form, including by using people. It is up to you to discern whether it is Him speaking, but when you know it is God saying, you must be in a place with your ears open to listen and your mind and heart ready to receive and be taught.
“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
2 Timothy 3:16-17
10. Understanding
- Definition: “an agreement about action to be taken.”
“Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or turn away from them.”
Proverbs 4:5
“Who is wise? Let them realize these things. Who is discerning? Let them understand. The ways of the Lord are right; the righteous walk in them, but the rebellious stumble in them.”
Hosea 14:9
“Many will be purified, made spotless and refined, but the wicked will continue to be wicked. None of the wicked will understand, but those who are wise will understand.”
Daniel 12:10
11. Overcomer
○ Definition: “A person who overcomes something: one who succeeds in dealing with or gaining control of something or problem or difficulty.”
As you embark on this journey of praying for these spiritual characteristics, please be reminded that where there is growth, many distractions will come your way from the enemy. The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy. He does not want you to be close in Spirit with God, so he will send anything in your direction to make you step out of character. You may slip up, but I want to encourage you to continue. Don’t measure the progress of your growth with what the world says, but measure it by your closeness in relationship with God behind closed doors. That is where your true character is revealed.
“They will do such things because they have not known the Father or me.”
John 16:3
“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”
Romans 8:18
“Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.”
James 1:12
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
James 1:2-4
12. Contentment
○ Definition: “Feeling or showing satisfaction with one’s possessions, status, or situation.”
Have you noticed how fast-paced this world has become? Technology makes almost every desire possible with instant gratification. People always go from one thing to another without sitting and taking in life. You may even know people who prayed for a home with certain qualities, and when they are blessed with everything, they find one flaw and are ready for the next chapter or planning the next house. When women give birth to a baby on day one, by day three, they are already naming the next baby that they are planning to have instead of just being in the current chapter of their life that they are currently in. Patience with people is fading from instant gratification, and when it is not met instantly, then attitudes are at their high.
Why? Why is it difficult to be content with what we have? Observing other countries and seeing what is a genuine need and what is meaningful, or thinking about what our ancestors had before us may change your perspective on the things around us that hold no value. Sister. Learn to be content with everything you have received as a gift from God. This is not to say that you can’t aspire to have the desires God placed on your heart, but to remind you that where you are now is a blessing. Be thankful for everything that you have this season. Try to go a week without yearning for senseless things that trigger your heart, and that would not glorify God and praise Him in the now of your life.
“I am not saying this because I am need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
Philippians 4:11-13
13. Compassionate
○ Definition: “having a marked by sympathy and consideration for others.”
“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
1 John 4:7-8
14. Established
○ Definition: “Accepted and recognized or followed by many people.”
Established gave a more explicit definition than “grounded,” but I wanted to emphasize how being rooted or, better yet, Stern in the word and given identity is essential. I don’t know how to explain the feeling of security in God, our Father’s hands. When God did the unthinkable by sending His son to die on the cross for you, God could not take back that action. The action of Jesus on the cross and resurrected is FINAL. That is the same as God’s Spirit in you. When you surrender your life to God, He establishes something no one can take away from you. A promised seal of adoption that you are His forever. He established that you will never be alone or forsaken at any point because His promise is established to His bride. You. No security on this earth could ever measure to a faithful Heavenly Father like our God. You can reciprocate that same character by being established in Him as He is in you. You have a chance to choose Him daily and live by the Spirit.
“Now it is God who makes both us and you stand firm in Christ. He anointed us, set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.”
2 Corinthians 1:21-22
15. Endurance
○ Definition: “The ability to withstand hardship or adversity.”
“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”
Romans 5:3-4
16.Peacemaker
○ Definition: “One who makes peace, especially by reconciling parties at variance.”
It is easy to be caught up in people’s drama today, but I advise you not to be the person who stirs the pot but one who contributes a positive outlook to manage the situation to better civil calming grounds. It may not even be drama that you are caught in, or it is people in your own home or family that seem to have a way of controlling your peace. The best way to respond to any conflict that brings unsettlement to your Spirit is by addressing the issue to God himself and speaking life to combat the specific areas that are attacked with the Word of God. Pray over every doorframe of your house and declare that your home is a haven where nothing but the Holy Spirit can reside. Be firm on not being moved to match the emotions of other people around you, but that you will bring an alternative through prayer or just speaking life to take back control of peace that Satan tried to strip away from those involved. Be the person who might be judged for being too good and doesn’t take anyone’s side but God, rather than being a troublemaker. It can be challenging at times, especially when harm is done against you, but be an overcomer in the situation, standing with peace on your side.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.”
Matthew 5:9
17. Useful
○ Definition: “Capable of being put to use or account.”
Although serving would be a better choice of word, I listed useful because of how it slightly separates its meaning of being used. What do I mean by that?
When serving people, you serve a person’s needs in various ways. But what if there is no one around to serve now? Have you ever heard your parents say, “You’re just sitting on the couch; get up and make yourself useful?” Your parents were not suggesting that you get up and serve them, but they were implying that you need not be lazy and be productive in something around the house. I am all for a moment of relaxation; if you know you need a break, then take a break. I am discussing our parents’ thoughts about getting us up from the couch. You can always do something to help build the Kingdom of God or build your relationship with God more vital than where you currently stand. If you think about it, God can use you in many ways in your home.
“Those who cleanse themselves from the latter will be instruments for special purposes, made holy, useful to the Master and prepared to do any good work.”
2 Timothy 2:21
18. Obedient
○ Definition: “Readily giving in to the command or authority of another.”
“This calls for patient endurance on the part of the people of God who keep his commands and remain faithful to Jesus.”
Revelation 14:12
19. Selfless
○ Definition: “Having or showing a great concern for other people and little or no concern for yourself.”
“And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, ‘The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation.”
Exodus 34:6-7
20. Responsibility
○ Definition: “The quality or state of being responsible: such as {moral, legal, or mental accountability} / {reliability, trustworthiness}.
Taking responsibilities, in other words, accountabilities, will allow you to reflect on your life and be aware of your decisions. This will also allow you to never fall into the trap of being a victim. (This does not include real trauma from other people’s actions towards you regarding assault, rape, or any crime that has partaken in the same categories as the others listed.)
“So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.”
Romans 14:12
21. Patience
○ Definition: A “Bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint.”
○ “Steadfast despite opposition, difficulty, or adversity.”
When I read the definition of patience and noticed the last part, “without complaint,” I was overwhelmed with the number of times I have complained during my waiting seasons for anything I was praying for. When you are told to be patient, are you ever questioning your actions and character in the waiting season of your life? Are you complaining more than usual? When you complain during your waiting season or question any area of your life, then by default, you say there is an error in God’s timing, judgment, and will for your life. God does not make any mistakes, but how you respond in your waiting season for healing or other blessings determines your heart and how you genuinely view God. Through the difficulties of waiting, ask God to remain hopeful and patient.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”
Galatians 5:22-23
“Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath, do not fret—it leads only to evil. For those who are evil will be destroyed, but those who hope in the Lord will inherit the land.”
Psalm 37:7-9
“Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”
Romans 12:12
” Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
Galatians 6:9
“Do everything without grumbling or arguing.”
Philippians 2:14
As you navigate your role as a Christian woman through each phase of your life, you will notice and be revealed attributes that you have and should pray to obtain in your everyday life. The characteristics I have listed above are not merely suggestions you should get but a list of characteristics aligned with who God is that you should already obtain fully. In Genesis, God said He created you in His image, not an image of your own liking. “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.” Genesis 1:27. The characteristics of God are planted in a child of God, and if you are questioning your character and wondering if they align with Him, then be steadfast on His word. Re-read these scriptures listed above and pray with your whole heart that you will walk with such a bold character like your Father. Be mindful in everything you do if it makes it easier to gain all these qualities. Sister, I pray that your journey of re-modeling your character to match your Father’s will go well with you.
God bless you!
Above all else, you must be God-fearing. “I issue a decree that in every part of my kingdom people must fear and reverence the God of Daniel. “For he is the living God and he endures forever; his kingdom will not be destroyed, his dominion will never end. He rescues and he saves; he performs signs and wonders in the heavens and on the earth. He has rescued Daniel from the power of the lions.”
Daniel 6:26-27
Cited Information Regarding Article:
Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). America’s most trusted dictionary. Merriam-Webster. https://www.merriam-webster.com/
